Written by Brian Shircliff, originally published on vitalitycincinnati.org grief: because to return to old ways of life only leads to death i grieve i grieve the ill the dead those who care for them for those who wish they did i grieve for ones who have not yet awakened that this is a brand new day but most of all i grieve my life, for what i missed in living long before the outbreak made us revisit mortality (how stupid could we be to forget) i grieve my old life, embarrassed by the clutchingness, the grabbiness, the overindulgyness …all of it having so little to do with life something in me knew it was false, though i played right along… i mean, Gautama gave us the experiment to know it: sit watch how each sensation comes, goes nothing lasts yet how i ever wanted it to last… so little to do with life i grieve tears do come for it, being lost and apart from what ‘was’ i grieve which is to say, i let my sail unfurl and take up a new wind away from what was known, comfortable, always i set sail for some place else inside me a birth (berth) to leave behind the old dance forms for awhile — (square, flamenco, ball, etc.) and free-form it no-form it not to any old/recorded music not to any live music either but the rhythms in the air, the wind, the murmurs of neighbors, fellow creatures the oldest music of time to Joseph Campbell it in the woods (a new verb) to read three chunks of the day and do whatever i want for the fourth -- allow the old patterns present in everything to announce themselves (how the hero’s journey made foolish heroes of us all) so i can choose a fresh, untrod path a true adventure a sensation yes it’s time to take up my life again to take up living even when all around us is death — the ill, old structures, dependencies -- and be washed in new waters, dreams where inner sails can finally sleep — Brian Shircliff
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